








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 83 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1283 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,273 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 629 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1249 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 888 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1507 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $749,681 of utility $212 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 233 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cool guy | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | Raindyrps | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | DaimonAngel | 57% | 30 |
| #4 | kixetic | 54% | 26 |
| #5 | 🎉🍾HAPPY NEW YEARS🍾🎉 | 51% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Weirdy Strangey | 50% | 16 |
| #8 | Ancros | 50% | 36 |
| #9 | Dw0lke | 44% | 9 |
| #10 | Saaable | 44% | 18 |
| #11 | donkfingus | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Weirdy Strangey | 8 | 0.0233 |
| #2 | I WILL RULE THIS STARK DOMAIN | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Ancros | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | DaimonAngel | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | kixetic | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I WILL RULE THIS STARK DOMAIN | 192 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | 🎉🍾HAPPY NEW YEARS🍾🎉 | 86 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Saaable | 69 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ancros | 66 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | kixetic | 60 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaimonAngel | +1.48 | 84 | 49 |
| #2 | kixetic | +1.07 | 51 | 49 |
| #3 | donkfingus | +0.77 | 80 | 47 |
| #4 | cool guy | +0.48 | 50 | 37 |
| #5 | I WILL RULE THIS STARK DOMAIN | +0.34 | 76 | 53 |





