








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1988 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 241 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3538 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,748 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1503 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1971 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1890 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1384 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,456,502 of utility $231 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 442 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | STF | 79% | 33 |
| #2 | dexteR ❤ | 76% | 136 |
| #3 | snow | 76% | 224 |
| #4 | Klondike♛ | 75% | 101 |
| #5 | genka | 73% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | dexteR ❤ | 76% | 136 |
| #3 | snow | 76% | 224 |
| #4 | Klondike♛ | 75% | 101 |
| #5 | genka | 73% | 102 |
| #6 | S.O.U.P.C.A.N | 68% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snow | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Klondike♛ | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | dexteR ❤ | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | genka | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | S.O.U.P.C.A.N | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snow | 465 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #2 | S.O.U.P.C.A.N | 194 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Klondike♛ | 193 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | STF | 155 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #5 | genka | 141 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gfn | +3.12 | 86 | 52 |
| #2 | Klondike♛ | +2.21 | 81 | 67 |
| #3 | dexteR ❤ | +1.99 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | STF | +1.55 | 80 | 73 |
| #5 | snow | +1.54 | 77 | 60 |





