








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1691 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 272 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 164 matches | ||
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




285 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10198 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,986 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5230 | 37% |
| Smokes | 4406 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3067 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1283 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,147,258 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3701 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | ⛧𝖂𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗⛧ | 46% | 238 |
| #9 | 𝔈𝔩𝔢𝔪𝔢𝔫𝔱 | 46% | 61 |
| #10 | friend | 46% | 59 |
| #11 | GuroPup | 45% | 67 |
| #12 | crowbar enjoyer | 44% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | friend | 20 | 0.0167 |
| #2 | prollybored | 10 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | castrate | 9 | 0.0096 |
| #4 | ⛧𝖂𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗⛧ | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | boxxy | 6 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | self sacktualization achieved | 243 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | boxxy | 181 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | ⛧𝖂𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗⛧ | 144 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #4 | 9 | 136 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | GuroPup | 127 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | holly | +3.31 | 77 | 33 |
| #2 | self sacktualization achieved | +0.16 | 74 | 43 |
| #3 | GuroPup | +0.06 | 71 | 50 |
| #4 | friend | -0.33 | 63 | 37 |
| #5 | boxxy | -0.44 | 50 | 49 |





