








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 454 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1901 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,337 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1657 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1713 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1356 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1611 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $794,791 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 210 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | f0rest4kill | 57% | 35 |
| #3 | MΣ GustA# . | 55% | 29 |
| #4 | BalerioN- | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | ★✪Lιgн†nιng™. _ w0w✪★ | 52% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | KillerDeagle | 46% | 13 |
| #9 | psychoRZR | 43% | 21 |
| #10 | ☠♈αя♏αη⋃☠ヅ | 42% | 55 |
| #11 | ☯Sℹ︎ℓ︎⋎︎عя☯ | 38% | 16 |
| #12 | Hemlock | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P33ING^♕ | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Lime | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Hemlock | 2 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | ★✪Lιgн†nιng™. _ w0w✪★ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | -Flux | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P33ING^♕ | 415 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | ★✪Lιgн†nιng™. _ w0w✪★ | 207 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | ☠♈αя♏αη⋃☠ヅ | 183 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | Lime | 158 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #5 | f0rest4kill | 77 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime | +2.00 | 81 | 62 |
| #2 | MΣ GustA# . | +1.17 | 81 | 55 |
| #3 | P33ING^♕ | +0.99 | 79 | 70 |
| #4 | ☯Sℹ︎ℓ︎⋎︎عя☯ | +0.74 | 73 | 71 |
| #5 | ★✪Lιgн†nιng™. _ w0w✪★ | +0.73 | 62 | 51 |





