








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 438 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 442 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3244 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,054 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7355 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4772 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 8701 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 7226 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,484,747 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | apoLLo | 59% | 51 |
| #2 | n00k`lear | 56% | 48 |
| #3 | ♨BᴀMBᴀM♨ | 50% | 133 |
| #4 | P8riQt | 49% | 47 |
| #5 | aDDy | 48% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Steve Stifler | 41% | 288 |
| #11 | reAl´Devil | 41% | 148 |
| #12 | Zero | 40% | 129 |
| #13 | FREAQ' ;7 | 39% | 66 |
| #14 | r1k | 39% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r1k | 20 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Steve Stifler | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Zero | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | ♡𝒦𝒾𝓂♡ | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | ♨BᴀMBᴀM♨ | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steve Stifler | 737 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | Zero | 641 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #3 | MagicEagle90 | 430 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | RvonA | 298 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | ♡𝒦𝒾𝓂♡ | 273 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FREAQ' ;7 | +4.10 | 66 | 63 |
| #2 | r1k | +3.01 | 68 | 58 |
| #3 | ♨BᴀMBᴀM♨ | +2.26 | 42 | 54 |
| #4 | n00k`lear | +1.92 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | ☠☣BLEEK☣☠ | +1.67 | 43 | 62 |





