








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 282 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 110 matches | ||
| Wingman | 62 matches | ||
| Renown | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 28 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3810 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,729 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2660 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3245 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2153 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2671 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $818,602 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 194 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Royal Bacon | 81% | 21 |
| #2 | karlkani | 78% | 27 |
| #3 | -turtles- | 74% | 100 |
| #4 | Iksel | 73% | 60 |
| #5 | <[Jacob]> | 67% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | zyfr | 66% | 111 |
| #9 | 3cK0 | 61% | 157 |
| #10 | Dominick Deccoco | 57% | 77 |
| #11 | Mini | 55% | 94 |
| #12 | NinjaM0nk | 50% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -turtles- | 11 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | zyfr | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | M4d5 | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Iksel | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | 3cK0 | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4d5 | 381 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | 3cK0 | 350 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | <[Jacob]> | 268 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #4 | Dominick Deccoco | 225 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | Iksel | 223 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guidetti | +3.04 | 81 | 64 |
| #2 | -turtles- | +2.64 | 80 | 37 |
| #3 | Iksel | +2.52 | 79 | 57 |
| #4 | karlkani | +1.80 | 85 | 60 |
| #5 | M4d5 | +1.34 | 84 | 72 |





