








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 456 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 204 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Renown | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 37 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5077 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,669 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5245 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3248 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3326 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3850 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $948,912 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | system! | 68% | 34 |
| #2 | -turtles- | 63% | 92 |
| #3 | Iksel | 61% | 41 |
| #4 | guidetti | 61% | 157 |
| #5 | Matt | 58% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | <[Jacob]> | 55% | 97 |
| #10 | M4d5 | 52% | 128 |
| #11 | jNk | 49% | 47 |
| #12 | Sani | 48% | 29 |
| #13 | NinjaM0nk | 48% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zyfr | 10 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | -turtles- | 9 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | <[Jacob]> | 8 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | M4d5 | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Iksel | 5 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4d5 | 514 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | Dominick Deccoco | 409 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #3 | guidetti | 369 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | <[Jacob]> | 341 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #5 | Mini | 274 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guidetti | +2.48 | 81 | 68 |
| #2 | Iksel | +2.28 | 83 | 58 |
| #3 | -turtles- | +1.68 | 77 | 42 |
| #4 | M4d5 | +1.59 | 84 | 70 |
| #5 | system! | +1.31 | 84 | 73 |





