










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 83 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1180 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,772 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1764 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1312 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1450 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1246 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $367,556 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 211 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | set777 | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Neymarcos #Γ©toiss | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | alicate de pressΓ£o | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | resende | 53% | 83 |
| #5 | Akame | 52% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | alicate de pressΓ£o | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | resende | 53% | 83 |
| #5 | Akame | 52% | 25 |
| #6 | Ehrcke | 51% | 72 |
| #7 | JORJI. | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | resende | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Ehrcke | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Neymarcos #Γ©toiss | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Akame | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | set777 | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ehrcke | 185 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | resende | 162 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | alicate de pressΓ£o | 64 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | Akame | 56 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | JORJI. | 43 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | set777 | +3.10 | 85 | 57 |
| #2 | JORJI. | +2.42 | 63 | 60 |
| #3 | resende | +1.90 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | alicate de pressΓ£o | +1.77 | 50 | 69 |
| #5 | Ehrcke | +0.48 | 63 | 59 |





