








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 315 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,217 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2770 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2098 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2512 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1837 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $716,141 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | W3sT | 85% | 20 |
| #2 | Ph4ntOm | 58% | 126 |
| #3 | Mc.Sneaky | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | Cany | 48% | 79 |
| #5 | Einfach besser l2p | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | W3sT | 85% | 20 |
| #2 | Ph4ntOm | 58% | 126 |
| #3 | Mc.Sneaky | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | Cany | 48% | 79 |
| #5 | Einfach besser l2p | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cany | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Ph4ntOm | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | W3sT | 2 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | Einfach besser l2p | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Mc.Sneaky | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ph4ntOm | 450 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | Cany | 155 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | W3sT | 86 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #4 | Einfach besser l2p | 48 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mc.Sneaky | 30 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | W3sT | +14.35 | 98 | 63 |
| #2 | Einfach besser l2p | +4.77 | 84 | 60 |
| #3 | Cany | +3.20 | 78 | 54 |
| #4 | Ph4ntOm | +2.74 | 68 | 62 |
| #5 | Mc.Sneaky | -0.77 | 43 | 48 |





