








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 173 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1582 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,213 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1529 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1537 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 856 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1291 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $356,879 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | becker | 82% | 17 |
| #2 | Snakes | 82% | 17 |
| #3 | lou | 80% | 10 |
| #4 | LittleBEER | 78% | 9 |
| #5 | djay | 77% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | r0bz | 55% | 11 |
| #14 | Baba D DinkS | 50% | 10 |
| #15 | kaw0nee | 50% | 18 |
| #16 | LegumZ | 48% | 29 |
| #17 | Str8 "CS.PRO" | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KiCk!nG | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | djay | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | mike481 | 2 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | Str8 "CS.PRO" | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Snakes | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KiCk!nG | 265 | 0.28 | 8 min |
| #2 | djay | 183 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #3 | Outback | 116 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | LegumZ | 101 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | mike481 | 96 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BiNoX | +3.40 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | Snakes | +2.40 | 79 | 67 |
| #3 | KiCk!nG | +2.31 | 77 | 81 |
| #4 | djay | +1.59 | 84 | 75 |
| #5 | Outback | +1.40 | 89 | 71 |





