








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2524 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,720 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1701 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1857 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1011 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1151 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,208,233 of utility $250 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 502 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bokkie | 56% | 119 |
| #2 | ECCHI | 55% | 206 |
| #3 | TL MonkE | 53% | 139 |
| #4 | dragonrune003 | 50% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bokkie | 56% | 119 |
| #2 | ECCHI | 55% | 206 |
| #3 | TL MonkE | 53% | 139 |
| #4 | dragonrune003 | 50% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TL MonkE | 24 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | Bokkie | 23 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | ECCHI | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | dragonrune003 | 10 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ECCHI | 838 | 0.21 | 20 min |
| #2 | Bokkie | 290 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | TL MonkE | 263 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | dragonrune003 | 31 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K1ngCT | +4.86 | 78 | 57 |
| #2 | ECCHI | +0.76 | 58 | 62 |
| #3 | Bokkie | -0.65 | 58 | 41 |
| #4 | TL MonkE | -2.10 | 53 | 50 |
| #5 | dragonrune003 | -3.40 | 31 | 29 |





