








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 395 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




97 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7369 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,654 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6798 | 29% |
| Smokes | 7066 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5423 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4367 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,350,891 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trent Tripp | 65% | 82 |
| #2 | new player | 65% | 127 |
| #3 | nuke | 60% | 172 |
| #4 | POSSUMATOR | 58% | 165 |
| #5 | bean | 56% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | bean | 56% | 116 |
| #6 | ReedUsDeletus | 55% | 44 |
| #7 | humblie | 53% | 236 |
| #8 | CobR | 51% | 116 |
| #9 | Primo | 43% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nuke | 27 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | bean | 21 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | new player | 20 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | humblie | 18 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | POSSUMATOR | 17 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | new player | 667 | 0.25 | 17 min |
| #2 | nuke | 528 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | CobR | 357 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #4 | bean | 316 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | POSSUMATOR | 275 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | new player | +4.17 | 86 | 67 |
| #2 | humblie | +1.87 | 87 | 46 |
| #3 | POSSUMATOR | +1.81 | 82 | 42 |
| #4 | snookerdoodle | +1.19 | 75 | 55 |
| #5 | nuke | +1.09 | 67 | 66 |





