








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 308 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 160 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1601 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,364 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1417 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2042 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1131 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1774 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $695,435 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sneræv | 58% | 53 |
| #2 | Hecht | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | Nekxi | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | Jamal | 49% | 85 |
| #5 | dymazz | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Chef Patron | 42% | 45 |
| #9 | Jim2k | 42% | 19 |
| #10 | Cl1ckCl1ck | 41% | 22 |
| #11 | Huahuas | 30% | 10 |
| #12 | FURI | 25% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sneræv | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Nekxi | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | FURI | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jim2k | +1.12 | 84 | 74 |
| #2 | Sneræv | +0.85 | 59 | 54 |
| #3 | Scottie | +0.81 | 70 | 64 |
| #4 | Jamal | +0.60 | 64 | 74 |
| #5 | P4TR1CKZ | +0.48 | 61 | 54 |





