










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 357 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 339 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3984 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,567 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2760 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2687 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3038 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2082 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,654,445 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 689 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Huug Gaming ♿ | 54% | 90 |
| #2 | Jaws | 49% | 265 |
| #3 | Dirigent Diederick klaplong | 48% | 62 |
| #4 | Hybride | 46% | 149 |
| #5 | Sandersan | 40% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Jaws | 49% | 265 |
| #3 | Dirigent Diederick klaplong | 48% | 62 |
| #4 | Hybride | 46% | 149 |
| #5 | Sandersan | 40% | 47 |
| #6 | date | 40% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaws | 34 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Hybride | 12 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Sandersan | 9 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | Dirigent Diederick klaplong | 8 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | date | 7 | 0.0128 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaws | 542 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #2 | Hybride | 218 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | Huug Gaming ♿ | 174 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Dirigent Diederick klaplong | 149 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Sandersan | 108 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Huug Gaming ♿ | +1.47 | 73 | 56 |
| #2 | Jaws | +1.04 | 69 | 65 |
| #3 | Dirigent Diederick klaplong | +0.68 | 70 | 56 |
| #4 | Hybride | +0.42 | 69 | 54 |
| #5 | Sandersan | -0.49 | 73 | 43 |





