








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,941 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 576 | 30% |
| Smokes | 508 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 579 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 278 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $343,193 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hersh | 48% | 21 |
| #2 | Acheron-X | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | w i n d y | 46% | 24 |
| #4 | Shadow Hegemony | 43% | 23 |
| #5 | same | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w i n d y | +4.33 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | hersh | +1.91 | 47 | 45 |
| #3 | OaIei! | +1.56 | 73 | 63 |
| #4 | Acheron-X | +1.48 | 77 | 28 |
| #5 | mai onegai | +0.82 | 39 | 65 |





