








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1138 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1338 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1192 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1290 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 685 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $453,171 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Paggen | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | Lo siento, Wilson | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | Daddy Jase | 55% | 83 |
| #4 | TinyFroggiee | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | Quack? | 50% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Cattie | 46% | 39 |
| #9 | efaN | 45% | 22 |
| #10 | Jackarys | 42% | 31 |
| #11 | Prison Mike | 27% | 22 |
| #12 | Ribbler the Diddler | 8% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daddy Jase | 141 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | Quack? | 96 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | m0tch | 59 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Jackarys | 49 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | efaN | 40 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TinyFroggiee | +5.45 | 86 | 45 |
| #2 | Cattie | +2.92 | 73 | 44 |
| #3 | efaN | +2.61 | 63 | 57 |
| #4 | Paggen | +1.05 | 58 | 58 |
| #5 | Lo siento, Wilson | +0.69 | 53 | 60 |





