








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
197 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 681 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 96 | 14% |
| Smokes | 223 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 158 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 204 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $224,123 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pergamon | 86% | 7 |
| #2 | Jesperwow | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Jecky | 80% | 10 |
| #4 | Prettige Pikpap | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | BOT Gizmoo | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Jesperwow | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Jecky | 80% | 10 |
| #4 | Prettige Pikpap | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | BOT Gizmoo | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | Jaro | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prettige Pikpap | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Pergamon | 2 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | Jaro | 1 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prettige Pikpap | 77 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | Jecky | 31 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | Jaro | 26 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #4 | Pergamon | 20 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #5 | BOT Gizmoo | 16 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jecky | +8.68 | 87 | 58 |
| #2 | Prettige Pikpap | +6.01 | 70 | 40 |
| #3 | Jaro | +3.79 | 80 | 30 |
| #4 | BOT Gizmoo | +2.44 | 42 | 40 |
| #5 | Pergamon | +1.69 | 64 | 48 |





