








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 375 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 64 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




81 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1948 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,007 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1759 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1800 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1608 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 840 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $982,651 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1839 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | axwq | 18 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | KLEINES HUND | 13 | 0.0143 |
| #3 | pobbus | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | semloh | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | ASTROX | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pobbus | 291 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #2 | semloh | 176 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | axwq | 158 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | the jonkler | 75 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | KLEINES HUND | 68 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the jonkler | +5.04 | 84 | 48 |
| #2 | semloh | +4.82 | 85 | 65 |
| #3 | pobbus | +2.58 | 66 | 37 |
| #4 | axwq | +1.44 | 61 | 46 |
| #5 | ASTROX | +0.82 | 59 | 32 |





