








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 460 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 449 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3145 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,544 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 710 | 7% |
| Smokes | 3918 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 4068 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1848 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,173,868 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 447 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chever | 50% | 26 |
| #2 | ERCENS | 48% | 33 |
| #3 | Pistolu Virtuozs | 45% | 110 |
| #4 | outsider | 44% | 206 |
| #5 | Helo`u | 42% | 341 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | aidzis | 41% | 46 |
| #7 | kristaps | 41% | 143 |
| #8 | Peterino Whatsappino | 38% | 39 |
| #9 | owner | 38% | 32 |
| #10 | Miks | 38% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Helo`u | 29 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | outsider | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | kristaps | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Pistolu Virtuozs | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | aidzis | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Helo`u | 272 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #2 | outsider | 243 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #3 | kristaps | 226 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | ERCENS | 61 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Miks | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ERCENS | +1.69 | 68 | 54 |
| #2 | outsider | +1.61 | 68 | 47 |
| #3 | Pistolu Virtuozs | -0.50 | 24 | 43 |
| #4 | Miks | -0.88 | 42 | 49 |
| #5 | Hook | -0.98 | 34 | 37 |





