








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 763 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 865 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 91 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7823 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,528 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4652 | 12% |
| Smokes | 13856 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 10713 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 8307 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,482,440 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 618 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miks | 49% | 51 |
| #2 | Chever | 48% | 60 |
| #3 | Peterino Whatsappino | 45% | 119 |
| #4 | Pistolu Virtuozs | 45% | 235 |
| #5 | outsider | 43% | 258 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Pistolu Virtuozs | 45% | 235 |
| #5 | outsider | 43% | 258 |
| #6 | Hook | 42% | 341 |
| #7 | aidzis | 42% | 53 |
| #8 | kristaps | 41% | 147 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pistolu Virtuozs | 19 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Hook | 18 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | kristaps | 16 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | outsider | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Peterino Whatsappino | 5 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | outsider | 345 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #2 | kristaps | 241 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | Hook | 134 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #4 | Pistolu Virtuozs | 76 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | Miks | 49 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | outsider | +1.51 | 70 | 45 |
| #2 | Pistolu Virtuozs | -0.32 | 24 | 48 |
| #3 | Helo`u | -0.57 | 32 | 68 |
| #4 | Hook | -0.83 | 34 | 36 |
| #5 | Chever | -0.87 | 38 | 45 |





