








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 108 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
788 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,636 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1130 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1057 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 606 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 843 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $110,140 of utility $69 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomp | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | bogdan | 100% | 4 |
| #3 | VilleS | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | Pistorasia | 75% | 4 |
| #5 | ★Zanny | 70% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | j o n z | 64% | 14 |
| #7 | Apa_88 | 61% | 18 |
| #8 | ZooM | 59% | 27 |
| #9 | 0pa58 | 54% | 28 |
| #10 | VeleHo | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Apa_88 | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZooM | 131 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #2 | ★Zanny | 101 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | 0pa58 | 84 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Apa_88 | 67 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | tomp | 33 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pistorasia | +3.71 | 87 | 76 |
| #2 | ★Zanny | +3.45 | 83 | 63 |
| #3 | VilleS | +2.13 | 84 | 78 |
| #4 | ✪ Kala | +2.05 | 94 | 71 |
| #5 | ZooM | +0.87 | 91 | 63 |





