








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 185 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 113 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1693 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,169 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1411 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1967 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1414 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1377 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $478,778 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snowman | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Tomppa | 75% | 40 |
| #3 | VeleHo | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | j o n z | 66% | 50 |
| #5 | Apa_88 | 63% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | j o n z | 66% | 50 |
| #5 | Apa_88 | 63% | 59 |
| #6 | ★Zanny | 60% | 43 |
| #7 | ✪ Kala | 54% | 28 |
| #8 | ZooM | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Apa_88 | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | j o n z | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Tomppa | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Apa_88 | 256 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #2 | ✪ Kala | 174 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #3 | ★Zanny | 130 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | ZooM | 108 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | j o n z | 81 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ★Zanny | +3.34 | 85 | 65 |
| #2 | Tomppa | +1.78 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | ✪ Kala | +1.03 | 92 | 77 |
| #4 | Apa_88 | +0.49 | 62 | 78 |
| #5 | 0pa58 | +0.22 | 60 | 75 |





