








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
914 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,579 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 414 | 26% |
| Smokes | 402 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 457 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 306 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $878,233 of utility $351 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jono | 48% | 48 |
| #2 | Miggy Almiron | 44% | 36 |
| #3 | nuzzi | 42% | 38 |
| #4 | valararararygayko | 41% | 66 |
| #5 | Gooby | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | nuzzi | 42% | 38 |
| #4 | valararararygayko | 41% | 66 |
| #5 | Gooby | 38% | 8 |
| #6 | cheeseball | 31% | 32 |
| #7 | adi ! | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cheeseball | 11 | 0.0174 |
| #2 | valararararygayko | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | jono | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | nuzzi | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Miggy Almiron | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nuzzi | 145 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | valararararygayko | 128 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | cheeseball | 103 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Miggy Almiron | 62 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | jono | 35 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miggy Almiron | +4.30 | 86 | 67 |
| #2 | Gooby | +0.59 | 76 | 50 |
| #3 | jono | +0.05 | 62 | 50 |
| #4 | nuzzi | -0.37 | 71 | 63 |
| #5 | valararararygayko | -0.46 | 63 | 41 |





