








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 809 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 429 matches | ||
| Faceit | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,030 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9167 | 33% |
| Smokes | 7207 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4873 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 6783 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,659,391 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 756 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Swoffmiester | 54% | 82 |
| #8 | mandu | 52% | 54 |
| #9 | Dr. DD | 48% | 44 |
| #10 | Insanity | 46% | 108 |
| #11 | MasterAce <3 | 45% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z | 37 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | flairr | 36 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | Exzotikk(LFT) | 14 | 0.0122 |
| #4 | Swoffmiester | 12 | 0.0071 |
| #5 | Insanity | 7 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flairr | 657 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #2 | z | 529 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | YKNSE | 376 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #4 | Swoffmiester | 254 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | mandu | 250 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MasterAce <3 | +1.68 | 78 | 50 |
| #2 | z | +1.31 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | obiiking | +0.97 | 75 | 61 |
| #4 | Swoffmiester | +0.75 | 69 | 60 |
| #5 | Exzotikk(LFT) | +0.42 | 89 | 47 |





