










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
419 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,271 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 457 | 36% |
| Smokes | 446 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 176 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 192 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $175,549 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SMEAGOLL_MHY69 SKINS | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | Eduardo211 SKINS | 52% | 25 |
| #3 | Teo Biceps | 50% | 24 |
| #4 | | m1gnea | | 49% | 49 |
| #5 | Pulosul_Negru | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Teo Biceps | 50% | 24 |
| #4 | | m1gnea | | 49% | 49 |
| #5 | Pulosul_Negru | 33% | 12 |
| #6 | Covrigem | 20% | 5 |
| #7 | KyroX SKINS | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | | m1gnea | | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Teo Biceps | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Pulosul_Negru | 3 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | SMEAGOLL_MHY69 SKINS | 1 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teo Biceps | 61 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | | m1gnea | | 26 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #3 | Covrigem | 25 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| #4 | Eduardo211 SKINS | 15 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | SMEAGOLL_MHY69 SKINS | 10 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Covrigem | +12.37 | 96 | 62 |
| #2 | | m1gnea | | +2.24 | 61 | 29 |
| #3 | !ANDR3I | +1.17 | 25 | 54 |
| #4 | Pulosul_Negru | +0.77 | 56 | 26 |
| #5 | Eduardo211 SKINS | -1.58 | 24 | 47 |





