










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 3 different maps



Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
38 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 134 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 44 | 33% |
| Smokes | 38 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 21 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 31 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $24,500 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | banana | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | skibidi du | 50% | 2 |
| #3 | Toozz | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | nanahira fan 727 | 29% | 7 |
| #5 | kokoers | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Toozz | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | nanahira fan 727 | 29% | 7 |
| #5 | kokoers | 29% | 7 |
| #6 | Preslune | 25% | 4 |
| #7 | temp | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | temp | 3 | 0.0600 |
| #2 | kokoers | 1 | 0.0078 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kokoers | 8 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #2 | banana | 5 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #3 | nanahira fan 727 | 4 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | Preslune | 2 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | Toozz | 2 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skibidi du | +3.95 | 41 | 7 |
| #2 | nanahira fan 727 | +1.77 | 91 | 46 |
| #3 | banana | +0.06 | 44 | 38 |
| #4 | kokoers | -1.20 | 64 | 52 |
| #5 | dicecream | -1.39 | 56 | 42 |





