








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 236 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1661 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,912 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 682 | 23% |
| Smokes | 973 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1071 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 186 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $476,215 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 122 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Big Boss | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Stayedsnake509 | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | Nox | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | Fenless | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | Totalx | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Fenless | 55% | 11 |
| #5 | Totalx | 47% | 17 |
| #6 | KC Crusader | 36% | 14 |
| #7 | 16bitfrost | 35% | 17 |
| #8 | Armor | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stayedsnake509 | 2 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | Big Boss | 2 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | Fenless | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Totalx | 55 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #2 | 16bitfrost | 13 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #3 | Nox | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | Fenless | 4 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | Big Boss | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chronic BLS (Big Load Syndrome) | +2.12 | 74 | 49 |
| #2 | Totalx | +1.52 | 76 | 72 |
| #3 | KC Crusader | +0.71 | 40 | 33 |
| #4 | 16bitfrost | -0.23 | 19 | 45 |
| #5 | Nox | -0.26 | 50 | 26 |





