








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 73 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 272 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3013 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,588 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2439 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3856 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 2188 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1105 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $689,084 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grymi | 62% | 66 |
| #2 | Horifide | 60% | 77 |
| #3 | SZipp | 59% | 46 |
| #4 | ⭕⃤ McLovin⭕⃤ | 58% | 38 |
| #5 | roaCH | 58% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Dux | 53% | 155 |
| #10 | SoupMeister420 | 50% | 36 |
| #11 | Tazz | 46% | 35 |
| #12 | PeeDizzle | 45% | 56 |
| #13 | BeanMaster | 45% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dux | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Grymi | 7 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Chiefin | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Horifide | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | PeeDizzle | 5 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeanMaster | 449 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #2 | Dux | 348 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | Chiefin | 320 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | Horifide | 306 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | PeeDizzle | 246 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grymi | +2.70 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | Pop pop | +2.20 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | Horifide | +1.71 | 56 | 58 |
| #4 | Dux | +1.40 | 88 | 52 |
| #5 | BeanMaster | +1.28 | 70 | 57 |





