








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 191 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




91 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1251 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,713 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 968 | 21% |
| Smokes | 765 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1582 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1398 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $89,372 of utility $29 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ropsuw | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | Look at my lawyer dawg | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Cookie` | 59% | 34 |
| #4 | Niles | 58% | 38 |
| #5 | LeWa | 54% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Niles | 58% | 38 |
| #5 | LeWa | 54% | 110 |
| #6 | Mimmilehmä | 53% | 79 |
| #7 | ves | 50% | 62 |
| #8 | OG LapsiSotilas | 49% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mimmilehmä | 36 | 0.0235 |
| #2 | LeWa | 23 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | OG LapsiSotilas | 15 | 0.0091 |
| #4 | ves | 14 | 0.0116 |
| #5 | Cookie` | 4 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeWa | 482 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #2 | Mimmilehmä | 271 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | OG LapsiSotilas | 238 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | ves | 171 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Cookie` | 134 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ropsuw | +3.73 | 60 | 63 |
| #2 | Cookie` | +2.02 | 52 | 75 |
| #3 | Tim Cheese | +1.61 | 66 | 32 |
| #4 | Niles | +1.10 | 62 | 47 |
| #5 | ves | +0.76 | 44 | 60 |





