








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1648 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1533 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 120 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




137 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12011 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 58,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15726 | 27% |
| Smokes | 13373 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 15707 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 13418 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,848,250 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1639 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SamUL | 54% | 96 |
| #2 | Good Guy Nick | 54% | 156 |
| #3 | Jot | 52% | 200 |
| #4 | 有趣的中国人 | 50% | 418 |
| #5 | уaкoъ | 49% | 514 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Good Guy Nick | 54% | 156 |
| #3 | Jot | 52% | 200 |
| #4 | 有趣的中国人 | 50% | 418 |
| #5 | уaкoъ | 49% | 514 |
| #6 | Android18 | 46% | 177 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 有趣的中国人 | 85 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | уaкoъ | 22 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Jot | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Android18 | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Good Guy Nick | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | уaкoъ | 1442 | 0.13 | 38 min |
| #2 | Jot | 1119 | 0.26 | 34 min |
| #3 | 有趣的中国人 | 815 | 0.09 | 21 min |
| #4 | Android18 | 758 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #5 | Good Guy Nick | 292 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Android18 | +2.22 | 73 | 64 |
| #2 | Jot | +1.64 | 66 | 75 |
| #3 | 有趣的中国人 | +1.10 | 79 | 52 |
| #4 | Good Guy Nick | -0.30 | 58 | 56 |
| #5 | The Business | -0.36 | 42 | 65 |





