








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1066 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 347 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6013 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,495 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12200 | 50% |
| Smokes | 5505 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3712 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3078 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,627,889 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 655 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mick | 54% | 35 |
| #2 | уaкoъ | 52% | 89 |
| #3 | The Business | 52% | 200 |
| #4 | dentron | 51% | 109 |
| #5 | Orange | 50% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dentron | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | The Business | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Ryab | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | 有趣的中国人 | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Orange | 4 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Business | 515 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #2 | DLA | 308 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #3 | Orange | 236 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | уaкoъ | 233 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | Ryab | 173 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DLA | +3.74 | 89 | 57 |
| #2 | mick | +2.25 | 62 | 64 |
| #3 | Android18 | +2.15 | 64 | 68 |
| #4 | Jot | +1.31 | 68 | 73 |
| #5 | dentron | +0.32 | 60 | 34 |





