








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 244 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3146 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,370 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2122 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1736 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 3318 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3194 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $654,282 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 314 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steven | 86% | 21 |
| #2 | sk | 78% | 23 |
| #3 | iz | 71% | 28 |
| #4 | izryshaterboss | 61% | 79 |
| #5 | Mattefs | 57% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | izryshaterboss | 13 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Unicornpooper | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | tostino | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Mattefs | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | sk | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jehovah's Witnesses | +2.96 | 77 | 66 |
| #2 | sk | +2.46 | 87 | 65 |
| #3 | kebaba | +2.23 | 81 | 61 |
| #4 | Ca$h | +1.52 | 82 | 35 |
| #5 | tostino | +1.26 | 76 | 61 |





