








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 424 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Esplay | 17 matches | 1,957 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,317 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1602 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1427 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2117 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2171 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,213,734 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 204 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jehovah's Witnesses | 71% | 28 |
| #2 | femboy | 65% | 108 |
| #3 | sk | 63% | 158 |
| #4 | birdcat??? | 61% | 33 |
| #5 | kebaba | 60% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | femboy | +5.04 | 72 | 59 |
| #2 | sk | +2.79 | 82 | 67 |
| #3 | birdcat??? | +2.66 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | Jehovah's Witnesses | +2.49 | 71 | 67 |
| #5 | kebaba | +2.09 | 81 | 62 |





