








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 284 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8884 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,174 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10861 | 33% |
| Smokes | 8693 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8086 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5534 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,592,114 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KouwyNツ | 52% | 221 |
| #2 | t0fu | 50% | 248 |
| #3 | Cardo | 49% | 732 |
| #4 | lonlei | 48% | 628 |
| #5 | FOENEM | 48% | 301 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Cardo | 49% | 732 |
| #4 | lonlei | 48% | 628 |
| #5 | FOENEM | 48% | 301 |
| #6 | Frigid | 46% | 168 |
| #7 | Huch | 45% | 229 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cardo | 49 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | lonlei | 48 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | FOENEM | 21 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Huch | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | t0fu | 11 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cardo | 1563 | 0.10 | 35 min |
| #2 | lonlei | 1206 | 0.09 | 31 min |
| #3 | KouwyNツ | 786 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #4 | Huch | 515 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #5 | FOENEM | 423 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | f12h | +3.25 | 68 | 72 |
| #2 | KouwyNツ | +2.58 | 83 | 61 |
| #3 | Huch | +1.45 | 77 | 63 |
| #4 | lonlei | -1.03 | 46 | 53 |
| #5 | Cardo | -1.38 | 59 | 64 |





