








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 992 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 311 matches | ||
| Premier | 198 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5520 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,147 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4752 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3644 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4497 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 4254 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,846,989 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 562 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Mr.S | 75% | 92 |
| #12 | Ace | 69% | 36 |
| #13 | z1ka | 69% | 39 |
| #14 | ✪> . RomeL . <キ | 60% | 98 |
| #15 | -AMT | 54% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✨قوست | 73 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | doom | 29 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Lelush✨ | 25 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | 702.🥀 | 18 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | z1ka | 13 | 0.0178 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✨قوست | 769 | 0.12 | 21 min |
| #2 | 702.🥀 | 483 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #3 | doom | 423 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | Lelush✨ | 413 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #5 | Mr.S | 373 | 0.22 | 8 min |





