








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 772 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 552 matches | ||
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7317 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,965 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7090 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8096 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5643 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 7136 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,614,681 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HanFy | 61% | 54 |
| #2 | Koray | 61% | 72 |
| #3 | tobse | 58% | 57 |
| #4 | EIK3000 | 57% | 190 |
| #5 | inff. | 57% | 153 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | THE PROFESSOR 8{ | 48% | 160 |
| #13 | Schaggsen | 48% | 50 |
| #14 | Tim | 47% | 51 |
| #15 | extra | 44% | 126 |
| #16 | tico | 43% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tuN1 | 4 | 0.0004 |
| #2 | inff. | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | BRTMX | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | THE PROFESSOR 8{ | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | EIK3000 | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tuN1 | 3466 | 0.39 | 87 min |
| #2 | THE PROFESSOR 8{ | 869 | 0.25 | 29 min |
| #3 | BRTMX | 811 | 0.17 | 22 min |
| #4 | epix | 569 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #5 | inff. | 444 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tuN1 | +1.52 | 74 | 69 |
| #2 | tico | +1.39 | 85 | 63 |
| #3 | Koray | +1.38 | 77 | 70 |
| #4 | THE PROFESSOR 8{ | +1.04 | 73 | 77 |
| #5 | EIK3000 | +1.01 | 72 | 65 |





