








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
734 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 219 | 18% |
| Smokes | 283 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 359 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 355 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $226,671 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enwondee | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | stef | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Stiopasniper | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | бабушка Аня | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | бабушка фрося | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enwondee | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | stef | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Stiopasniper | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | бабушка Аня | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | бабушка фрося | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | бабушка фрося | 8 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | бабушка Аня | 5 | 0.0121 |
| #3 | stef | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Enwondee | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Stiopasniper | 1 | 0.0098 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stef | 57 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | бабушка фрося | 51 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | бабушка Аня | 37 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Enwondee | 25 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Stiopasniper | 14 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enwondee | +6.02 | 90 | 46 |
| #2 | stef | +2.99 | 53 | 62 |
| #3 | KIng_ | +1.32 | 55 | 37 |
| #4 | бабушка фрося | +0.80 | 66 | 51 |
| #5 | Stiopasniper | -0.46 | 42 | 46 |





