








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 69 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
319 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 533 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 198 | 37% |
| Smokes | 128 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 111 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 96 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $120,769 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enwondee | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | KIng_ | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | Musca | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | stef | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | бабушка фрося | 43% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enwondee | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | KIng_ | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | Musca | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | stef | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | бабушка фрося | 43% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | бабушка фрося | 9 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | KIng_ | 3 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | stef | 2 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | бабушка фрося | 111 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | stef | 72 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | KIng_ | 13 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | Musca | 13 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Enwondee | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enwondee | +6.34 | 90 | 43 |
| #2 | Musca | +3.27 | 78 | 66 |
| #3 | stef | +2.17 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | бабушка фрося | +0.15 | 56 | 48 |
| #5 | KIng_ | -0.03 | 43 | 25 |





