








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 76 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
866 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,402 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1458 | 43% |
| Smokes | 1059 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 576 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 309 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $191,226 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | 𝔄𝔗𝔗𝔢 | 56% | 25 |
| #6 | Ucco | 53% | 30 |
| #7 | RoopeZ | 53% | 55 |
| #8 | PAZ869 | 51% | 57 |
| #9 | Hinaaja | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PAZ869 | 10 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | RoopeZ | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Ucco | 5 | 0.0103 |
| #4 | 𝔄𝔗𝔗𝔢 | 5 | 0.0108 |
| #5 | ✪ Maakari | 3 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RoopeZ | 220 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #2 | ✪ Maakari | 91 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | 𝔄𝔗𝔗𝔢 | 91 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | PAZ869 | 89 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ucco | 81 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Maakari | +3.60 | 58 | 76 |
| #2 | pk | +3.14 | 88 | 60 |
| #3 | RoopeZ | +2.33 | 78 | 56 |
| #4 | 𝔄𝔗𝔗𝔢 | +1.38 | 52 | 52 |
| #5 | Ucco | +0.69 | 50 | 50 |





