








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 513 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 214 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3181 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,536 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9086 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7673 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4608 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4169 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,160,534 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seи | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | Rooss | 66% | 35 |
| #3 | DuhHero | 61% | 33 |
| #4 | the midmeister | 57% | 35 |
| #5 | ✪J. | 53% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Solus | 46% | 68 |
| #10 | SchifferPro | 44% | 27 |
| #11 | Jonboy | 42% | 133 |
| #12 | [SFS] iRiSH | 40% | 110 |
| #13 | [SFS] Nology | 40% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_RiGhT | 9 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | [SFS] Nology | 8 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Solus | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | [SFS] iRiSH | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | ✪J. | 4 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonboy | 415 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | Solus | 332 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #3 | ✪J. | 318 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #4 | [SFS] Nology | 317 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | GeT_RiGhT | 248 | 0.29 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seи | +3.01 | 85 | 66 |
| #2 | the midmeister | +2.92 | 75 | 43 |
| #3 | [SFS] Nology | +1.30 | 72 | 54 |
| #4 | Rooss | +1.24 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | DuhHero | +1.07 | 66 | 42 |





