








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 152 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 55 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1145 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,601 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 765 | 21% |
| Smokes | 997 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1004 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 835 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $858,419 of utility $267 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | oyda | 33% | 18 |
| #10 | Lober #LOBERCLUTCH | 28% | 18 |
| #11 | Unota | 27% | 30 |
| #12 | potatoes | 23% | 13 |
| #13 | Oyxu hellcase.org | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lober #LOBERCLUTCH | 8 | 0.0227 |
| #2 | KvH | 4 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | TSMaggi | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | K0nics | 3 | 0.0169 |
| #5 | Unota | 2 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TSMaggi | 109 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | potatoes | 64 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #3 | Lober #LOBERCLUTCH | 57 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | KvH | 56 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kampy | 51 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K0nics | +4.35 | 69 | 34 |
| #2 | KvH | +3.86 | 77 | 54 |
| #3 | Influencer | +3.65 | 53 | 46 |
| #4 | potatoes | +2.24 | 69 | 74 |
| #5 | oyda | +1.01 | 56 | 50 |





