








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 936 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 499 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 137 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




63 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8619 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,935 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11477 | 33% |
| Smokes | 10383 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5059 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 8016 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,227,259 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 481 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ruski | 69% | 78 |
| #2 | Gee | 66% | 50 |
| #3 | Indy | 63% | 129 |
| #4 | thr0w | 58% | 81 |
| #5 | Ruski | 53% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | thr0w | 58% | 81 |
| #5 | Ruski | 53% | 64 |
| #6 | SwagDon / PaperTracer | 52% | 493 |
| #7 | xpl1cit˚·。 | 50% | 92 |
| #8 | kenyC | 43% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SwagDon / PaperTracer | 34 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | kenyC | 16 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | Indy | 11 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Gee | 10 | 0.0105 |
| #5 | Ruski | 6 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SwagDon / PaperTracer | 1595 | 0.16 | 35 min |
| #2 | Ruski | 380 | 0.25 | 9 min |
| #3 | Indy | 321 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #4 | Ruski | 291 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #5 | kenyC | 274 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gee | +5.05 | 79 | 83 |
| #2 | Indy | +1.43 | 93 | 58 |
| #3 | Zako | +1.23 | 79 | 68 |
| #4 | Ruski | +0.99 | 79 | 69 |
| #5 | xpl1cit˚·。 | +0.79 | 83 | 62 |





