








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2243 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,507 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 511 | 9% |
| Smokes | 1537 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1731 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1728 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $794,706 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danilo | 62% | 52 |
| #2 | fukyoumean!!!! | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | Reacher | 54% | 39 |
| #4 | endlesscashflow | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | Prestone® Antifreeze | 51% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | endlesscashflow | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | Prestone® Antifreeze | 51% | 145 |
| #6 | ketoky friechik | 50% | 185 |
| #7 | Jaw | 49% | 89 |
| #8 | fella | 41% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prestone® Antifreeze | 17 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | ketoky friechik | 13 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | fukyoumean!!!! | 6 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Jaw | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | fella | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fella | 285 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #2 | ketoky friechik | 234 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #3 | fukyoumean!!!! | 162 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | Prestone® Antifreeze | 119 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | danilo | 83 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danilo | +3.15 | 87 | 62 |
| #2 | Reacher | +1.38 | 86 | 53 |
| #3 | ketoky friechik | +1.24 | 75 | 53 |
| #4 | cgar | -0.13 | 77 | 47 |
| #5 | fella | -0.33 | 75 | 68 |





