








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 478 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 131 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1553 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1170 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1563 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1577 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1146 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $438,093 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 356 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .Cook | 47% | 72 |
| #2 | BUBBLES | 45% | 11 |
| #3 | kashim | 45% | 144 |
| #4 | WOLFGANG | 45% | 38 |
| #5 | finley | 42% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BUBBLES | 45% | 11 |
| #3 | kashim | 45% | 144 |
| #4 | WOLFGANG | 45% | 38 |
| #5 | finley | 42% | 76 |
| #6 | Mango | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kashim | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | finley | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | BUBBLES | 2 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | .Cook | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kashim | 240 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #2 | .Cook | 100 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | WOLFGANG | 51 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | finley | 38 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | BUBBLES | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DC | +1.99 | 53 | 56 |
| #2 | WOLFGANG | +1.19 | 82 | 34 |
| #3 | finley | -0.19 | 53 | 30 |
| #4 | kashim | -1.23 | 46 | 50 |
| #5 | .Cook | -1.76 | 50 | 41 |





