








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 639 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2310 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,856 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1879 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1220 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1771 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 986 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $853,474 of utility $199 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 127 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mellwen | 67% | 39 |
| #2 | Nounoute77 | 61% | 67 |
| #3 | Eim | 58% | 76 |
| #4 | kanA | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | NiKouMouk | 50% | 153 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Nounoute77 | 61% | 67 |
| #3 | Eim | 58% | 76 |
| #4 | kanA | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | NiKouMouk | 50% | 153 |
| #6 | Oui_Liaam | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NiKouMouk | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Nounoute77 | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Eim | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Mellwen | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NiKouMouk | 341 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Eim | 294 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #3 | kanA | 123 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nounoute77 | 86 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Oui_Liaam | 56 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eim | +2.59 | 64 | 66 |
| #2 | kanA | +1.87 | 68 | 57 |
| #3 | YeaZz | +1.68 | 72 | 57 |
| #4 | Mellwen | +0.80 | 46 | 48 |
| #5 | Oui_Liaam | -1.21 | 32 | 78 |





