








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 544 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 416 matches | ||
| Faceit | 154 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3488 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,232 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2764 | 13% |
| Smokes | 8057 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 4767 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5644 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,441,530 of utility $238 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 199 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YeaZz | 61% | 67 |
| #2 | Incha'Allah peek Taoufiakqc | 52% | 105 |
| #3 | naka | 50% | 38 |
| #4 | Mellwen | 50% | 345 |
| #5 | Eim | 47% | 524 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oui_Liaam | 28 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Eim | 21 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Incha'Allah peek Taoufiakqc | 20 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | kanA | 18 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Mellwen | 18 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eim | 1769 | 0.16 | 41 min |
| #2 | kanA | 1051 | 0.12 | 25 min |
| #3 | Oui_Liaam | 794 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #4 | Mellwen | 286 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #5 | Incha'Allah peek Taoufiakqc | 280 | 0.12 | 7 min |





