








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 433 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Wingman | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2462 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,223 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2526 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1841 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2577 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2279 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,629,378 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1231 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruben | 61% | 41 |
| #2 | SnowCat | 58% | 215 |
| #3 | MonoHornet | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | jiraiya | 56% | 36 |
| #5 | soosh | 51% | 171 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnowCat | 462 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #2 | soosh | 221 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | ruben | 102 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | jiraiya | 50 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | airikka | 33 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruben | +3.00 | 36 | 28 |
| #2 | jiraiya | +2.86 | 38 | 50 |
| #3 | SnowCat | +2.58 | 59 | 41 |
| #4 | Google drive | -0.13 | 20 | 37 |
| #5 | MonoHornet | -0.34 | 49 | 13 |





