








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1971 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 274 matches | ||
| Faceit | 257 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 31 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10159 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8564 | 33% |
| Smokes | 6475 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6308 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4813 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,662,241 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 218 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PapaRevVv | 57% | 115 |
| #2 | P A I N | 55% | 162 |
| #3 | ip man | 54% | 374 |
| #4 | Socks | 54% | 170 |
| #5 | Andro | 54% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | GGEZ | 48% | 132 |
| #11 | D0NL | 44% | 80 |
| #12 | MarkeyMark | 43% | 54 |
| #13 | 1O1Box | 41% | 59 |
| #14 | ElusiveSmoke | 37% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P A I N | 20 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | ip man | 10 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | The Dusty Chest | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | GGEZ | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Socks | 4 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ip man | 818 | 0.11 | 21 min |
| #2 | Socks | 665 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #3 | P A I N | 662 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #4 | The Dusty Chest | 587 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #5 | PapaRevVv | 456 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Decept | +2.78 | 73 | 62 |
| #2 | ip man | +2.66 | 61 | 64 |
| #3 | P A I N | +1.49 | 68 | 59 |
| #4 | Socks | -0.22 | 66 | 68 |
| #5 | PapaRevVv | -0.43 | 60 | 65 |





