








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 167 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
771 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,369 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 559 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1108 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1341 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 361 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,206,386 of utility $327 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 86 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Masoj | 52% | 119 |
| #2 | eGo | 51% | 140 |
| #3 | Trolli | 49% | 96 |
| #4 | DonDonald007 | 45% | 130 |
| #5 | ماركو | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | eGo | 51% | 140 |
| #3 | Trolli | 49% | 96 |
| #4 | DonDonald007 | 45% | 130 |
| #5 | ماركو | 42% | 31 |
| #6 | grafvmd | 31% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eGo | 9 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Masoj | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | DonDonald007 | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Trolli | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | ماركو | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eGo | 305 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | Masoj | 266 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | DonDonald007 | 185 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | Trolli | 69 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | grafvmd | 58 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Masoj | +5.25 | 71 | 70 |
| #2 | eGo | +3.74 | 66 | 59 |
| #3 | Trolli | +2.27 | 48 | 62 |
| #4 | ماركو | -0.41 | 51 | 32 |
| #5 | DonDonald007 | -4.16 | 6 | 59 |





