








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1063 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Faceit | 198 matches | ||
| Wingman | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




146 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5542 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,104 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10275 | 37% |
| Smokes | 7364 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5486 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4979 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,490,887 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2285 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fentanyl Consumer Tony | 59% | 238 |
| #2 | ForTheBasen | 57% | 364 |
| #3 | jag äter hundar | 56% | 147 |
| #4 | Disconnect.wtf | 55% | 40 |
| #5 | Joe | 54% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Joe | 54% | 39 |
| #6 | PierreNie | 53% | 206 |
| #7 | Rapid-fire monster | 53% | 55 |
| #8 | Bean Boi | 53% | 276 |
| #9 | Hoffmann | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ForTheBasen | 52 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Fentanyl Consumer Tony | 47 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | Bean Boi | 22 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Hoffmann | 18 | 0.0162 |
| #5 | Rapid-fire monster | 12 | 0.0120 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ForTheBasen | 1985 | 0.27 | 49 min |
| #2 | Fentanyl Consumer Tony | 643 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #3 | PierreNie | 409 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #4 | jag äter hundar | 280 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Rapid-fire monster | 190 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ForTheBasen | +4.41 | 76 | 74 |
| #2 | Fentanyl Consumer Tony | +2.78 | 79 | 65 |
| #3 | Tonpede | +0.69 | 59 | 67 |
| #4 | PierreNie | -0.28 | 53 | 53 |
| #5 | Joe | -0.38 | 59 | 62 |





